Life is busy enough. Between work, family obligations, time with your friends, and household chores, dating adds another complex layer to the things you try to accomplish each week. You don’t have time to spend wading through poor matches. How do you craft the perfect dating profile to ensure you’re matched with people you want to get to know better?
With so many people using online dating sites, you want a profile that stands out. It needs to be accurate, informative, and appealing. It needs to capture exactly who you are and what you want in a partner. My tips are going to help you create a dating profile that stands out and captures the attention of compatible matches.
Dating Profiles Are Not One Size Fits All
One of the biggest mistakes people make involves building one profile and copying and pasting it to every dating site. That doesn’t work because different platforms focus on different aspects of a profile. Some sites, such as Tinder, focus more on pictures, while OkCupid is more about your written bio. eHarmony urges people to be very specific and answer all questions with at least a few sentences.
You need to write different bios for each site. Make sure you have quality photos and descriptive paragraphs that tell your story in a positive, friendly way. Read other profiles and pick the ones that stand out to you. Analyze what they did that makes you react positively to it. Then, go back and look at your profile and tweak it on each site as necessary.
After writing your profile, make sure you circle back and update it each month. People are always growing and changing, and you want to keep your profile fresh with the latest information. For example, if you tried Ethiopian food at a new restaurant and can’t get enough of it, that could be an update to your hobbies and passions.
Tell Your Story With Honesty But Stay Positive
As you craft your bio, it’s where you’re telling people who you are. Make sure you are honest. While you might think a few white lies make you look better, you’ll end up getting caught as a liar and that’s not going to win you any suitable dates. It’s better to be honest from the start. Hit these markers to draft the ideal profile.
A Memorable Opening Line
Write a one-liner that reflects exactly who you are, whether that’s your wit or your passion for poetry, and showcase it. If you’re a little nervous and dealing with the butterflies that come with nerves, share it. You’re not alone, and that connection can be a good way for others to realize you have something in common.
Be Yourself
Don’t make up a fictitious version of yourself. Carrying a few extra pounds? Many others do, too, so it’s nothing to be ashamed of. If a potential other is turned off by it, you’re better off without them. Embarrassed that you don’t have a high-paying executive position. Whatever you do is just as vital, so embrace who you are. If you’re not sure how to answer a question, try anyway and be honest as you do.
For example, there’s a question about “What are you looking for?” and you’re not sure what you’re looking for. Don’t give a cliched answer that’s the same as everyone else. You would talk about how you’re not 100% sure, but right now, you simply want to explore and make connections.
Skip the Negativity
Like many of us, you might have had your heart broken. Don’t mention that. Stay positive in your profile. You’re not here to dwell on the negative, you’re here to showcase who you are in an upbeat, positive way.
Talk About the Things You Love
Ideally, you’re here to find the right match. Share the things you enjoy and that make you tick. What are you passionate about? Cover your hobbies and quickly mention why that hobby is important. Do you love playing miniature golf and make it a point to go to every course you can find? Share it!
As you do share who you are and what you love, be descriptive. Avoid generic language. It’s time to be descriptive and paint a picture
Be Succinct
For most dating apps, you’re not writing a novel. Be succinct and come up with clear answers that express who you are in no more than a few sentences. If you get too wordy, people aren’t going to want to keep reading.
Answer All Prompts
When a dating site has prompts for you to answer, choose the ones that best fit your interests, personality, and life values. It’s your time to engage and shine, and you want to do it in a couple of sentences. As you do, make sure you’re keeping the same tone of positivity and even humor if you’re that type of person. You want to catch attention and create a hook that keeps people reading.
Be Honest About Deal-Breakers
Everyone has deal-breakers, and you want to be honest about yours. As you do, make sure you’re gracious about it and don’t label others with those quirks as being bad or gross people. Everyone is different, so you want to put a positive spin on your deal-breakers.
Common deal-breakers include children or people who own a certain type of pet (you’re allergic to cats but not dogs, so cats are a deal-breaker). You might not want to be with someone who eats meat if you’re vegan, or in the opposite situation and love meat and can’t see yourself with a vegan.
You dislike professional sports and don’t want to be with someone who watches every sport imaginable and never leaves the house on game days. Be honest about those deal-breakers from the start. At the same time, be open to trying new things if it’s not a full deal-breaker.
Tips for Choosing Photos
Before you upload images, make sure they’re quality vs. quantity. You do want a few photos, but they need to be quality images. Ideally, upload between four and six photos that show who you are, and that means profile images, full body shots, and candid images where you’re enjoying something you’re passionate about.
If you love the beach, a photo of you looking off to the sunset over the water is an alluring take on your passion and shows your full body at the same time. That’s an idea for a candid image that shows a lot about you.
As you choose your images, make sure you’re smiling in them and not frowning or pulling the past trend of the duck face. The duck face makes people look juvenile and doesn’t show originality at all. Smile and do your best to look natural.
Create a Call to Action
End your profile with a call to action. Consider asking a question that engages potential matches to answer your question. That gets a discussion started and helps draw people in. You could end with a descriptive sentence of your ideal date and ask potential matches to reach out and share what their ideal date looks like.
It’s Time to Proofread, Edit, and Proofread Again
Now that you’re done, it’s time to proofread and make any corrections. Read your profile backward and out loud to catch errors you might otherwise overlook.
Consider adding a free grammar-checking app like Grammarly or Ginger as a backup. They offer free apps you can add to your browser, Google Drive, or Microsoft Office.
Bring in a Pro
Even the best writer can struggle to create a successful dating profile. Don’t be afraid to admit it’s difficult to portray the best version of yourself while remaining positive and honest. The Relationship Expert is the dating coach you need on your side. I can help you take a deep dive into who you are and how to best represent yourself on dating apps.
